Invisible Crown, Hide Your Crazy 3) 2015
“I don’t care if she’s giving birth to a freaking two headed purple alien named George. That woman has no right to call in the fucking middle of the night and demand him to bring her pickles that come in the squatty jar.” Throwing my phone across the bar top, I cringed when I heard it shatter on the hardwood floor.
“Well, now I’m only speaking in technical terms, but I think she does have the right to call him.” Megan winced for the impact of my verbal onslaught, knowing damn well the comment she made would push me over the edge this morning.
“Well, fuck. I guess the tramp can call him. But, to demand pickles in the small jar opposed to just grabbing whatever is on the shelf is absolutely absurd.” Opening the fridge, my eyes land on a large jar stuffed amongst the crap on the top shelf. “Give me your phone,” I demand, letting the fridge close with a smile.
Snatching the phone Megan had offered out to me, I quickly dialed Danielle, knowing she will be completely down with this genius plan of mine. “So, the bitch wants pickles. I’m going to give her pickles. Who do I call to get a hundred cases of pickled asparagus delivered?”
(Subject to change/Unedited)